Friday, December 28, 2012

Gen 3: And this is how it ends...

My story starts and ends the same way. With a tragedy. I'm not someone important or anything really to anyone. Even my kids don't need me most the time. People pretend that I'm important to them and I mean something, but as I lie in this bed alone, I realize how unimportant I really am to this world. 

You must be confused at why I'm saying this or what's going on. It really is kind of a sad story to end everything with. It was a normal day. I had aged the kids and needed to get some money out of the bank. So I left Nessie, Laura, and Rose in charge. I jumped in my car and drove to the bank where my little sister, Eden, works. She waved at me when I walked in but that's all I can really remember at that point.

The next thing I knew, I was waking up in an empty room. I struggled to get up but managed to before realizing I was completely naked.  I tired to cover myself but nothing worked. I looked down at my body and instantly felt insecure. This isn't my body. I attempted to look at my naked back. The demon scars had to be there! But they weren't. I was instantly frantic because this body, free of scars, was beautiful and didn't belong to me.

"So, Ande, I see you've woken up. I've been waiting quite awhile." a man dressed in all white appeared before me in less than an instant. He grabbed my hands and held them in his.
"What happened?" My protective walls shot right up even though I was already naked in front of him. "What happened?"
"You protected your sister in that bank, Ande. You're paying the price for something that someone else did." He brought his hands out from behind his back and handed me a robe to slip over my body.
"I want to show you just what happened."

Instantly, I was back in the bank and the memories flooded into my mind. The fear and pain as that man grabbed my neck and held it too tight. Those eyes that I remember from all the days that I was locked in that basement, tortured and my spirit broken.
"It's Perry, isn't it?"
"Exactly right. Even if you didn't try to protect Eden, he would have known you anywhere. You had no way out of this either way, my dear."
The memory went on. Eden, behind the counter. Her hands were up but what he didn't realize was there was an earpiece in her ear. As he was screaming for all the money to be given to him, she quietly phoned the police.

"WHO CALLED THE FUCKING POLICE?" Perry screamed, squeezing my neck tighter as the sirens rang outside the bank doors. He didn't hesitate, the gun in his hand raised to my head and he was about to shoot. He whispered in my ear, something I don't remember but would still haunt me forever. The rest was such a blur, what had happened? Had he shot me and then got shot by the police?
The memory stopped again, the bank was filled with police. There was blood on the ground and a white blanket covered in blood over  what must have been a body. Was it mine?

"Who is that?" I asked, it was barley a whisper. My hands were shaking, my balance off. I turned to the man in white. "WHO IS IT?"
"It's you, Ande." My breath caught in my throat and he noticed. He shook his head and grabbed my hands. "It isn't real, I'm showing you what could have happened if Eden wouldn't have done what she did."
"What did she do?" Suddenly, the memory paused. The police man had lifted up the blanket and my own face looked at me. Cold, dead. I looked away, a cold feeling starting to overtake me. "Let me show  you..."

The memory changed again and I was there, being held by Perry. His face close to my ear. I looked away from the two of us and trained my eyes on Eden. She had a small gun in her hands, aiming. Even a bit off and she could kill me but she pulled the trigger right before Perry did. I crumpled in pain, his shot hit the middle of my back. Her shot, hit his heart and he was dead in an instant.

I was on the floor, withering in pain. An instant is all it took for everything to go wrong.

I woke in a hospital bed. I was all alone. The pain shot up my back from where the bullet hit me. It took milliseconds to understand that I would no longer walk. So, now I'm laying here all alone reflecting on my silly lot in life. I wasn't happy with my life anyway the way it was so why would I want it to go back to normal now?

I was curled up into a ball, whimpering, when Spencer came in the room. "You're not one to give up easy." I didn't look up at him. I just let the pain spread through my body in that fetal position. He sat next to the bed and sighed, looking through papers in his hand.
"Your spine is severed. It's possible that you could never walk again." He brushed my hair back from my forehead. "You're just attracted to trouble, and that's one thing that I can't really stand about you."

I rolled out on my back with a little yelp and even more pain but I was about to burst into tears in front of this man and that was one thing that I never wanted. But it was almost like I needed to. I needed someone to hold me and tell me that it was okay. I pressed my hands to my eyes in an attempt to keep my tears from starting up.
"Ande, please don't cry..." but it had already started and soon I was sobbing. "Oh god please.." he got up and sat on the edge of the bed and pulled my face into his shoulder. It didn't stop. The tears kept coming and he  kept stroking my back and I was having a full blown emotional breakdown right when my mom walked in the door.

"Oh...I'm sorry, did I come at a bad time?!" She froze in the doorway and Spencer let go of me and turned to her. "No, you're fine Mrs. Langly. I'll leave you two to talk..." He slipped out of the room and I could tell that I had made him emotional as well as I had made myself.
"Ande, Eden is a wreck...She thinks she's the one who hit you." Of course she would  be worried about Eden. "But there are more important things going on. Who's going to take care of you?"
"I'll take care of myself."
"Don't be stupid." I looked at her stunned. "You're paralyzed. You can't do this on your own Ande. You just can't."
"You don't know that."
"I know." And that's when something snapped and I started screaming. I wasn't saying anything, just screaming at the top of my lungs like a little child throwing a tantrum. Everyone rushed into the room and stared at me. Screaming, wailing.

"Now listen to me." I held eye contact with each of them. Mom, Dad, Spencer, Eden, Arley. "I want everyone to stop deciding my future for me. So I can't walk? So what? I'm good at being stubborn." They all stared at me. "I'm not stupid. I'm not delusional. Mom, I can't do your challenge anymore. I just can't. If I could walk, I wouldn't even think about it anymore. I'm broken emotionally and physically. Nothing you say to me anymore can convince me to ever have another child under the influence of that challenge." I looked at my hands and sighed. "I want to have a real life, for once."

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Gen 3- Another day in paradise: Babies 41, 42, and 43

I pulled my hair in front of my shoulders, the length was almost too long for me but it smelled like hair dye. What was I thinking? Why would I do this to my already exotic hair color? The long, red locks draped my shoulders like a cloak. I stared at it, wishfully thinking that changing things about myself could change my past and maybe even my future.

"Mom! It's snowing!" Nessie pointed to the window and laughed her sweet little laugh. Her eyes trained on the white falling from the sky. "This truly makes it Christmas now!" I laughed and picked up the girl by her waist so she could see out the window better.
Laura glanced at me from where she was sitting on the couch next to Ellie. She noticeably made a double take and then stared at me with a shocked expression. "Mom? You're hair looks great!" She smiled and stood up to join her sister looking out the window.

I looked around my house, cheer filling my heart while Christmas music filled the air. I picked Xavior up and put his feet on mine and danced around with him. He howled with laughter and so did all the other kids. Ellie and Eric both picked up one of the kids and danced around with them as well. We were all having a jolly time, laughing and singing "Jingle Bell Rock"

Peter, Brian, and Stewie took turns playing their favorite Christmas music. Although our spirits were high, I was still a little peeved. I had agreed to let 5 of the children move out of my home. Ellie and Eric were on their way anyway, but Stewie, Brian, and Peter spent from the time I brought the babies home until now begging me to let them become adults. I said no and that that was the end of it but they kept asking. And asking. I finally agreed when the tears started but they didn't realize how much they were hurting me by wanting to leave early.

I was left alone with 3 children and 5 toddlers, no teenagers to help me out when I may need it. So I vowed to myself that these children would not be alone as long as I could help it. I wouldn't impose on anyone to take care of them besides myself. I phoned Spencer that night and he agreed to come over to my house and we'd continue the challenge.

He came over with all the stuff he needed and we got it done the quickest we could. He's all too used to my strange requests these days and goes all out to fulfill them. I asked him if he would sit down with me for some coffee after we were done. He accepted but seemed a little hesitant. I was planning on finally opening up to him for real. I wanted a change in my life and he was sitting right there.

My heart was beating a mile a minute as Spencer sat next to me in my apartment, his coffee in his hand. He brought it up to his mouth and I stared at it.
"Spencer, Iwannagooutwithyou."
"What?" He sat the coffee on the table and stared back at me. I took a deep breath and cleared my throat. "I want to go out with you."
His eyebrow raised and a smile formed on his lips. "Sorry, you're too late."
"What?"
"Do you know how many times I asked you to go on a date with me? Lots. I gave up. I'm in a relationship."

My heart crumbled.
I gaped at him stupidly with my mouth hanging open. I could tell that he was slightly enjoying the way I was acting by the way he was looking at me. Staring at me as if he was studying my behavior.
"Why now?" He asked, my eyes shooting up to meet his. "Why not when I asked? Is it all on your terms?"
"N-No..." he stared straight into my eyes, his burning golden. "I just...needed change."
"So that explains the hair then too."
This set me off. I stood up and shoved my chair in. In a fit, I walked into my room and slammed the door.

Spencer must have left about 2 minutes after I stormed off because when I came back out not 10 minutes later, his coffee was sitting on the table, still steaming. But he was nowhere in sight.I picked up his cup, sat it in the sink and turned on the tap. It filled with water and I shoved the rest of my dinner into the fridge.
My five babies were playing with each other on the floor in the living room where I joined them. They squealed "Mommy!" And jumped all over me, knocking me to the floor. I wrapped my arms around each of them, telling my babies how much I loved them.

Around 10:30, all of the kids were falling over themselves with exhaustion. And as I was getting each of them ready for bed, Aphrodite called me and freaked out the second she heard my voice say hello.
"OMGANDEIHAVETHEBESTNEWS!" She screamed and I pushed the phone away from my face.
"Calm down!"  I whispered back "The kids are in bed."
"ANDE I'M PREGNANT!" Once again my heart fell out of my chest. Aph was excited that she was holding a baby inside of her stomach and that was an every day thing for me. 
"Aph! I'm excited for you!" I said in the most cheerful voice that I could muster but there was nothing about this that made me any happier then I already was, just depressed about my own miserable life.

She went on and on to explain that she's been doing all this shopping and hadn't had any time to even pick up phone or stop by. She told me she  was about 9 weeks into it and was elated. I pushed through the conversation as well as I could.

The rest of my pregnancy dragged while wishing that I had a happy life that I could be proud of. My kids were the only thing that gave me any joy. Aph wasn't helping with her constant gush over how happy she was with her life and her husband and  her baby on the way. It made me think about my entire challenge. All of these children grew up without a father.

It was a short 3 days before my water broke and I went into labor. It was an easy labor and born to me that night were 3 little girls. I named them Jane, Cecilia, and Desmia.

I'm really sorry this post was so short but I have been really busy lately with school. I hope to have a few more posts out this month, hopefully 2 or 3. Really sorry for the long wait! I love all of you and please leave your feedback in the comments section.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Gen 3- Spencer and Ande-Babies 36, 37, 38, 39, and 40

"Sleep my child and peace attend thee,
All through the night
Guardian angels God will send thee,
All through the night.

I rocked back and forth, singing this lullaby a thousand times because this is Laura and Nessie's favorite. They were always the hardest to get into bed at night because they were such mama's girls. Rose lay fast asleep in her crib, the flickering lights in the window hardly made her stir. Rose was independent for her age. She didn't really need me as much as the other two. Although, having Nessie and Laura on my arms made it all better, for the first time in all of being a mother...I really felt needed and loved.

The soft sounds of them snoring soon escaped and even though I didn't want to, I laid the two beauties down in their cribs and shut the door behind me. In the living room, three adults stood by the TV waiting for me. I grasped each of them in a hug and told them how much I loved them. They were leaving my home and as always, it made me sad to think another 3 have just grown up and moved out.



I have two teenagers sitting on the floor doing homework, mindlessly casting fairy spells at each other and casually floating off of the ground. They were content. Peter, Brian, and Stewie were setting up a Christmas tree and I was honestly not needed here. I told Ellie and Eric that I was gonna step out for awhile and set out in the snow on my own.

I walked  to the clinic in order to get back into my old habit of only getting pregnant by the means of the AI. It only took about 15 minutes to get in and my butt out of there beore hbeing pulled into any real conversation that would take away more of my time with my kids. The snow was freezing  my feet but I walked and walked until I reached my house. I did pass the local bar...but the more I thought about going in and wasting myself again tonight....The more I realized how right my parents were. And then I thought about how I'm going to try as hard as I can to make my relationship with them right.


Once home, I flopped on the couch and let my legs dangle over the side. I wasn't feeling too well suddenly and then, Ellie woke me hours later telling me that she and Eric were leaving for school.
Shit.
"Ellie, why didn't you wake me before?"
"You're feverish, mom." She handed me a cold towel to put on my forehead and told me that she's got the boys on the bus and the girls sleeping. I thanked her and let her get on her way.

Nessie, Laura, and Rose's door creaked as I opened the door to check on the beauties. They were still snoring as if I had just laid them down to sleep. "I love you," I whispered as I pulled it back closed. "I wish was a good mother..."
My eyes were slowly fluttering closed again and there was nothing I could do about it.

"Mom, I made an appointment for you at the clinic."

This time, instead of her voice waking me, it was her cold hand resting on my forehead. It felt like ice and so did many of my limbs.
"Oh god, Ellie, I'm sorry.."
I stood up but felt dizzy.
"I've been out in the cold too much, I guess."
"Do you need me to drive you down? They're expecting you."
"No, I think I'm okay to drive. Just watch over the kids, please?"
"Sure mom..."

I sat in the parking lot of the hospital for over 15 minutes waiting for my mind to take over and do something. I wanted with all my heart to turn around and fabricate a story about how I just had a small cold. In spite of everything that I wanted to do, I unbuckled the seat belt and stepped into the bitter cold. I walked swiftly through the blinding wind and into the building where, sure enough...I ran right into Spencer. He nodded at me with a sweet smile and kept walking.

I made my way up to the front desk where me and the receptionist know each other pretty well by now. She smiled her cute little smile at me and asked "Why such the hurry back? You were just here yesterday for your usual!" Her perky attitude today slightly annoyed me to the point of frustration.
"I have an appointment. My daughter set it up for me."
"Ah! I see. Donna was in when that call came. So, with Dr. Angel, correct?"
"Is there any way I could see another doctor today?" I asked quietly. "I'm really not in the mood to deal with Spencer."
"Well, I could see if Dr. Beal has any openings?"
"That would be great."

I picked my purse up off the desk and had a seat where I could see the receptionist. She was talking on the phone with Dr. Beal. I wasn't sure who he was but it had to be better than-
My thoughts were cut off by Spencer who was coming back from whatever he was doing. He grabbed my hand and was now leading me to his room where he told me to have a seat.

"Spencer, I literally asked for anyone but you," I muttered between coughs. I was trying to sound fierce, but the sickness was kind of ruining it.
"You know, I would take offense," he murmured as he motioned for me to open my mouth for a thermometer. "But to be completely honest, I think I'm the only one who can take care of you."

"Stay." He ordered me, trying to move around the room without bumping anything over but failed quite a few times. He seemed to be keeping himself awake only on coffee. His desk was a mess with papers and files and his laptop was sitting on top of everything. I moved the thermometer around with my tongue, eying the papers sitting on Spencer's desk. He couldn't seem to grasp that I was trying to ask him what they were and why on earth he was so tired. "Spence?"

"Huh?" He asked, looking at the reading on the thermometer.
"What's up? You seem distracted."
"Nothing."
"And what's with the paper on your desk?"
"Oh, those...Um, I'm kinda doing a bit of college work on the side."
He stuck the thermometer back in my mouth and I moved it again to form a disfigured "What kind?"
He pressed his finger to my mouth to get me to shut up and then began his story...

 "Well, money is tight and this island is in a tough spot without any sort of physical therapy trainer. Too many injured people trying to fix themselves up on their own." He waved his hand dismissively. "So, a couple of us guys are taking the physical therapy course."
 "What guys?" I asked quietly as he moved quickly across the room for some other gadget.
"Just some of my friends from college," he muttered, holding something up to the light. He brought it down a moment later and switched it out with another shiny metal thing. Dang, I really didn't know my stuff.
"Well alright," I whispered to myself.

He moved his fingers up my neck to check for swollen glands. I felt almost a little to awkward with him so close to me but there was no denying that I liked it. When we were finally eye to eye, I just stared.
 "You alright there," asked Spencer after a drawn out moment, dropping his gaze from mine. A small smile seemed to be tugging at his lips, but he turned around before I could see if it turned into anything.
"Y-yeah," I bit my lip, looking to my side

"Want to lay down for me?" He asked skeptically, staring at my feet and moving just inches from me. When I didn't respond, he placed his hand on my chest and supported my back with the other and did it for me.
"Crap, sorry. I guess I'm a little out of it." But the blush on my cheeks gave the explanation a bit of an edge.
He ran his hand along my ribs, checking for any sorts of bloating or something medical like that. "Why are you scared to like anyone, Ande?"
I sat up, fast and stared at him. He caught me off guard and I certainly didn't like that. 
"What makes you believe that I'm afraid to like people?"
"Just the way you act. You're too hard pressed into a person that you don't think you can ever really be! Ande, you have an air of excellence about you and that isn't normal." He brushed my hair out of my eyes and just looked at me.
"You don't know everything, Spencer." I slapped a hurt expression on my face. "There are some parts of my life that I'd like to keep to me-"

I was cut off short again but his golden eyes staring into mine. He eased in closer until his nose was right next to mine, any closer and we'd be the same person. But I just stared into his soul and his tormented, abused, lonely eyes were crying out for me to help him. He just couldn't find the words to explain.
It felt like an eternity before he broke his close stare and grabbed a pair of gloves. I didn't speak after that. My heart was aching with such a sadness that I really couldn't feel any sort of love for this man. I couldn't reach inside my heart and honestly say that I wanted to hold his hand every day or wake up to him in my bed.

"Sorry." he mumbled, moving his body in a way I couldn't see his face once again. He fiddled with the metal thing in his hand and I'm sure he was thinking hard about what had just happened. That moment of silence. The pure moment of chemistry. That's exactly what he wanted to happen. He was trying to make me think.

I kept my eyes trained on him until he walked out the door with a mere whisper, "Be back in a minute.."
I dropped my gaze to my hands and stared at them but they didn't look normal. Everything was going blurry and weird and then was the pang to my head and then my chest which made me cry out in pain but no one was here to help. "Just a headache.." I thought, clenching my teeth and holding onto the top of my head.

"Alright, what I've got is giving me nothing. I'm gonna have to take a couple of the bigger tests." Spencer came bounding in the room with a little better attitude, perhaps he got a new cup of coffee?
"I was thinking we could test for a few things, strep throat, pneumonia, and mono." He grabbed my hand and helped me off the bed but the second I stood up, my knees buckled underneath me and I about went toppling to the floor if it wasn't for Spencer who grabbed my shoulders to steady me.
"You're completly off balance, are you okay?"
"Not really..." I trailed off, staring into some corner. He did as many tests as he needed to and we waited for the results as I napped.

"Wake up sleepyhead," I sat up but it made me feel dizzy. I trained my eyes on Spencer and he sat down next to me. "You have an extremely mild case of Pneumonia. We need to treat it right away to tackle it before it gets bad." I didn't even give myself any time to think before my attention caught my pregnancy.
"I'm pregnant...The antibiotics won't do anything to the baby, will it?"
"I'm gonna issue some really safe oral antibiotics. It shouldn't effect the baby but you can come in for an ultrasound after using it for a day or so to make sure that everything is going okay."
"And how long will it take to clear out?"
"2-3 Weeks at the least...I don't want to put you in the hospital but if it gets any worse then I'm afraid I will have to."
I sighed (which kinda hurt a little) and told him that that would be great and that I'm super tired of being the one who is always sick or in trouble.

He offered to drive me home but I said I was fine and trudged to my car. I drove home fine and got in the house.
"Mommy!" Laura grabbed onto my leg as I walked in the doorway.
"Mommmmm!" Nessie followed her sister and my feet were covered by toddlers.
Ellie was standing near the doorway with a totally exasperated look on her face, Rose asleep in her arms.
"They haven't sat down for even a second." She said, shifting Rose so she could hand her to me. I took her and rocked her while attempting to move about the room with my stylish toddler boots.
"How long have you been up?" I asked Ellie, grabbing a bottle from the fridge to give to Rose.
"Quite awhile, I tried to get Nessie and Laura to bed but they were waiting for you."
"Go get in bed, I'll wake you for dinner.." She turned around without another word and her door clicked shut.

I laid Rose down to sleep because she was out and not even trying to feed her would wake up that lazy child. Nessie and Laura let go of my feet but were at my heels, trying to keep up with their highly pregnant mother. I wobbled around the kitchen, throwing together something decent to eat, then remembered that I was sick and needed to take those stupid antibiotics. I took two just like Spencer said and went right on with dinner.

The antibiotics didn't seem to have any side effects, such as drowsiness or anything like that and after an hour, I felt great. Even pregnancy wasn't getting me down. I felt perfectly fine and healthy. A day or two went by perfectly fine and even the way I breathed was getting better because of the medicine.

out of nowhere, my phone started to ring. I wasn't expecting any calls and stared at the caller ID. It was Spencer so I answered it with a formal "Langly house, may I ask who's calling?" I laughed to myself, I felt unusually humorous and funny.
"Ande! Did you take the medicine I gave you?!" He seemed frantic and the humor disappeared immediately. I felt fine. "Yeah...I did. Why?"
"I'll tell you in a few minutes, just get back to my office. NOW!"
He hung up and I was instantly frantic and faint. What was going on?

I grabbed Nessie, Rose and Laura and pulled their sweaters over their heads.When I got to Spencers, all three of them were dozing. I rolled them inside in a triple stroller and Spencer met me at the door.
"Missy? Will you watch over Ms. Langly's children for me? Thanks." He rolled the stroller into her office and dragged me upstairs.

"Those antibiotics I gave you are fine....but they have one side effect to pregnancy. So, I want to do an ultrasound to make sure everything  is okay."
This synopsis scared me to death. "Is the baby gonna be okay?"
But he didn't answer, I was numb with fright for what on earth this could mean. I let decided to let him do the ultrasound because of how scared I was that this baby was going to have something wrong with it. The ultrasound equipment were cold...but I laid there, my eyes shut and heart beating a mile a minute.

"Just what I thought..." he sighed cooly, running his hand through his hair, possibly thinking of a way to tell me that by taking this medicine, I've ruined a child's life. "I hope you have enough room in your apartment for 5 children."
My jaw dropped, an instant of pure shock and confusion. "Why would I need...You mean...Wait? Quintuplets? I'm carrying 5 babies and I didn't know it?"
"At least it's not anything really bad? If you need help in your house I'm more than willing to drop in-"
I held my hand up to silence him. "Fine. What do I do about the antibiotics?"
"They've done their job. Don't take any more of them for the time being."

I stepped down from the table and a pang hit me like a baseball bat to the stomach. I leaned over and grabbed my stomach and Spencer realized what was going on.
"Stay calm." he said simply, grabbing my hand and holding my shoulder so I could stand straight up. "I'll get you something to take away the pain."
Labor sunk in before the pain relievers did. I gave birth to 3 girls, and 2 boys. Each of them was perfectly healthy and beautiful.

Britta, Zeela, Ashton are the girls and the boys are babies Xavior, and Zander.  It took awhile to get all of them and the girls home but I had Spencer's help.